Please read "How to sub". Thanks. This is 90% copypasta from previous runs:
The plan -- Signups will remain open through July 19. Late entries are ok but may be at a disadvantage for scoring. Alt subs are welcome within reason; if it becomes an issue I'll limit that later. Once entry is closed, I'll take roughly three to five weeks to score unless something unexpected comes up. When that's done, I'll reveal two categories per night Monday, Tuesday, Friday, and Saturday at roughly 9pm EST. I'll extend to Sunday if necessary, but full reveal should happen in a single week.
Points -- I use a completely arbitrary 0 to 10 scoring system with an above-average focus on category fit. Distribution is somewhat relevant to strength of field, with typically 1-3 tracks tanking hard and 3-5 getting 9+.
What to sub -- I would highly recommend sampling the tracks I provided. Beyond generic enjoyment, I'm usually looking for whether a tune captures a particular aesthetic I've laid out. The samples should hopefully flesh out a lot of vagueness in my descriptions.
HOW TO SUB -- PM me a Youtube or equivalent link to each of your submissions via the forum. Do not name the songs in your post or link them to me on Discord. If you feel inclined to share thoughts on your submission, spoiler them. I only want the raw URL. I don't want to know which tracks are yours. I find out who wins live, with you.
Tastes -- I wrote this when I posted my first Walrus and find no fault in it today, but with the exception of what to absolutely not submit (yes, someone sent me an auto-0 track once), I think pursuit of category fit is way more important than style. I don't "dislike" any genre, I just find a higher ratio of hits to misses in some. And for goodness sake don't sub Greta Van Fleet.
You're golden: aesthetic metal, post-rock, folk punk, vaporwave, alt/outlaw country
You're probably fine: vgm, psychedelic with balls, post-hardcore, drone, noise, indie with diverse instrumentation, hip-hop, chiptune, electronic stuff, stoner rock and metal, post-metal, non-theatrical avantgarde, folk metal, black metal, tech death metal, bluegrass, classical, folk, blues, jazz, most genres with a -wave suffix
Middle of the pack: lots of stuff
Good luck: superficial metal, pop country, hard rock, rock 'n' roll, mainstream punk, pop that isn't supposed to suck, ska, "prog metal" as a stereotype, theatrical stuff, songs from musicals, power metal that isn't exactly Blind Guardian, anything that gets labeled "world music" by choice, R&B, meathead $#@!, heavy music that actually attempts to sing well, probably anything that has ever been mentioned in Rolling Stone.
You're just getting a 0: anything that sounds remotely reminiscent of Guns n' Roses, AC/DC, or the Steve Miller Band. Also your favorite 80s metal band sucks.
There is a special place in hell for you: Babymetal
The morning air's still deliciously crisp, but the world's coming to life around you--a foggy mist in bloom. Sweet mornings and smooth nights flowing along to the constant warm rain.
Smashing Pumpkins - I of the Mourning
Alcest - Souvenirs d'un autre monde
Radiohead - Dollars and Cents
And summer, my nemesis. My relationship with heat has always been rocky. I'm the guy who scrapes snow off his car in shorts and a t-shirt. I try to immerse myself in any environment, but the summer requires mental fortitude. Chillaxing beach vibes will do nothing for me. I can kick back, say screw it, and embrace the beast, but not without some attitude or comical excess.
Kendrick Lamar - DNA
Ray Wylie Hubbard - Up Against the Wall Redneck Mother
Horsehunter - Nuclear Rapture
Send me something Asian in origin. Israel doesn't count. Russia doesn't count unless it's not ethnically European, like Tuvan music for example. This isn't a "folk" category; I had more of a Japan/Korea core in mind, but I don't want to be too exclusive here. If you are going to pursue a folk line, just avoid anything that could fly in Eurovision. I am especially curious about kpop, for whatever that's worth. That doesn't guarantee anything in my arbitrary garbage scoring process.
Send me something with major gospel influence or just straight-up gospel music. I'm not very familiar here, so popular songs are probably safe. Here are a few I adore for the taste-o-meter:
Kanye West - Ultralight Beam
Zeal & Ardor - Built on Ashes
Chance the Rapper - Finish Line
5. The Toe Sucker
Ok so... I want you to send me a song I don't like. I don't mean a guilty pleasure or comedy tune here. I want to walk away from repeated listening experiences thinking "Wow, that sucked." I'm going to basically grade this in reverse order. The more I like the song, the lower you're going to place. We're going for an experiment here. It's easy for me to fail a tune on cat fit or for just being wildly outside of my taste range, but if everyone aims for that I'm curious whether I authentically dislike any of it. I try to approach subs with a blank slate as best I can, and at some point "bad" converts into a positive comedy or diy appeal. I want to see how much the relative value of the field plays into my appreciation of individual tunes. I want to see if this is a self-defeating exercise or if there are sounds out there that just rub me wrong on a fundamental level any way I cut it. We're going to have to set some parameters for this to work:
Don't sub any thing released before 1985. I hate that old analog production sound. This is an identified peeve.
Unfamiliarity is important. Try to avoid pop sensations from the 20th century. Chances are I am sufficiently familiar with it to walk in with a huge bias. Basically no Pink Floyd, Rush, AC/DC, etc. I've conveniently spent the last 20 years under a rock, so 21st century hits are ok, though if it's achieved meme status you may inadvertently entertain me.
Don't sub anything openly racist/homophobic/etc. That should go without saying, but it could have a home in this category and we're just not going to go there.
6. The Best The Best The Best The Best
No particular gimmicks this time, just send me the most fun track you've got. I don't even care if you've subbed it to ME before. Six is always my wind down and have fun category, and I'm going to rate these strictly on whether they make me want to crank up the volume. For the uninformed, I have a highly exploitable sweet spot for memes.*
*MU staff have informed me that I will be permabanned if I let Rick Astley win again. Don't sub it.
The sun has fallen down, and the billboards are all leering, and the flags are all dead at the top of their poles. We're collectively past a breaking point, looking back in shattered exhaustion at an irreversible loss. Bleak resignation, emptiness, half-hearted last ditch attempts to make internal amends. Ideally, I would like this to feel broad in scale, maybe even apocalyptic. Less a deep personal loss in isolation, more a societal collapse or complete mental and physical ruin. Maybe the samples can help clarify what I'm getting at.
Samples that nailed it for me:
Oxbow - It's the Giving, Not the Taking
Masafumi Takada - Trial END
Liturgy - Total War
Vs samples that could fair decently but miss the scale factor:
Mount Eerie - Real Death
Radiohead - Motion Picture Soundtrack
We're still in this hell. There's no escaping that. But a will remains in the ashes. I'm looking for a song that progresses from a dark place into the light--not necessarily triumphant, but pulled up by its boot straps and ready to soldier on.
Envy - A Will Remains in the Ashes
A Silver Mt Zion - What We Loved Was Not Enough
Bright Eyes - Let's Not $#@! Ourselves
Received so far: