GRUG AMA GRUG AMA GRUG AMA

[Arete]

You always rand mason.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Is there anything in particular which you have lost, tangible or intangible, that you would like to regain?

I don't think I was ever in, like, great shape, but there was definitely a time in my life where I was passably physically fit, and I'd like to be that again, please.

What's your Battle of Winterfell writeup? Your Battle of the Bastards writeup was extremely hype!!!! Also, writeup for Hardhome please?!

Spoilered per request:

Two seasons ago, the Battle of the Bastards demonstrated that Westeros was rife with incompetent military commanders, with the Stark forces only triumphing over the Boltons because they made three or four colossal mistakes as compared to the Boltons' five or six. Unfortunately for the living (and for those hoping to take down Cersei in the final three episodes), it appears that very little has changed since then despite some decent preparations on the part of the living for last night's battle.

Let's talk about these preparations some more. The outermost line of defense was a long line of abatis ("the trench") that completely encircled Winterfell and could theoretically be set on fire at will. Next up was a bit of no man's land, followed by Winterfell itself, a very strong and defensible castle. The high-value target, Bran Stark, was placed inside Winterfell's godswood, which appears to be an interior location not adjacent to any of the castle's outer walls considering the Night King didn't immediately just concentrate his forces on that section and try to break through. All of this is fine and constitutes good planning.

(for the purposes of this post, I'm ignoring everything that has to do with the crypts, as the action that took place down there was clearly so the people like Tyrion and Sansa had something to do during the episode and it had no effect on the larger battle.)

The main problem that the army of the living had was in the placement of their forces. Their single biggest advantage was their excellent defensive position between Winterfell and the trench, and these idiots completely squandered it by placing the bulk of their forces IN FRONT of the trench. They willingly left their guys out in the open and without protection, despite protection being readily available! The entire point of a siege assault for the defenders is to, you know, DEFEND.

Ideally, the deployment of the living forces would have gone something like this: A skirmish line AT MOST out in front of the trench, with the intent being to cause minor disruption to the enemy's battle line before they retreat back to the safety of the trench. Between the trench and the castle walls, you get your first line of infantry troops, maybe the Vale forces or the Unsullied, ready to cause further disruption to any zombies who get beyond the trench once it gets lit on fire. You know how in the episode, it was a scary moment when the dead basically put out the fires and got through the trench by smothering it with their own bodies and creating a sort of zombie bridge, and then they had an easy rush on Winterfell? This wouldn't have happened if the living hadn't completely spent most of their forces by stupidly placing them out in the open.

Then - and we're back to an ideal world - once it becomes clear that the trench isn't doing anything anymore, the defenders on the outside retreat to Winterfell proper, also known as where the bulk of the defenders are in position. I feel like this makes sense considering it's the strongest fortification available to the living.

Basically, what the living should have done was make the dead bleed for every inch of ground, and triply so inside of Winterfell. You know those catapults that were firing near the start of the episode? They got what, one, maybe two volleys in before they had to stop firing? In a world with proper deployment (i.e. no defenders in front of the trench), those catapults do not stop firing until they're overrun. Your infantry force between the trench and Winterfell proper do what they can, but most of your troops are behind the walls.

When the dead started attacking Winterfell in the episode, you had maybe one or two defenders per section of wall. If the living had deployed their troops properly, you would have $%#!ing JAM-PACKED those walls with defenders, giving the dead literally no room to do anything. Concentration of mass is a thing! A fully-manned Winterfell would even have had a decent chance of checking the Night King's dragon (though that's a dicey proposition). But no, Jon and Davos and Dany and the rest of them decided that it was a better idea to leave most of their army completely out in the open.

At this point, we need to talk about the Dothraki charge at the start of the episode. From a cinematic standpoint, it was beautifully done, but from a military perspective, it was the single most utterly asinine military maneuver in the entire series so far, and that's saying something. You have this great mass of cavalry, one that can really disrupt momentum, and you... send it out charging at the start of battle? Before you even know what's out there? The Dothraki weren't equipped with dragonglass weapons; what were they supposed to do before Melisandre showed up out of nowhere and set their arakhs on fire? Was that always the plan? Not only was this charge completely ineffective and give the Night King some ready-made reinforcements, it also prevented the catapults from firing out of fear of hitting their own troops. If you absolutely must disrupt the enemy like that at the start of the battle, THAT'S WHAT DRAGONS ARE FOR.

Dany and Jon started the episode on a vista that overlooked Winterfell and the battle plain. That is where the Dothraki should have been as well. It's the high ground (shoutout to Anakin), and they have a good vantage point of the battle. What the Dothraki should have done was stayed up there, waited until the army of the dead was fully committed to Winterfell (ideally after the trench was fully breached), and then swept down upon on them similar to how Theoden managed the situation in Return of the King. The one thing they'd have to watch out for is the Night King's dragon, but even then there's no way that charge could have possibly gone worse than it did in the actual battle.

I get that thematically, one of the points of the battle was how quickly the defenders got overwhelmed and how hopeless of a situation they were in, but applying some basic military tactics and even literally just making use of the defenses they had already prepared meant it didn't necessarily have to be that way.

There's exactly one thing that the defensive strategy had going for it: it was SO ineffective and SO wasteful, that it effectively ended the battle so soon, the Night King felt comfortable enough to be drawn out of hiding and enter Winterfell himself in order to finish off Bran. Obviously, this left him very much exposed to what little resistance remained in the castle and ultimately proved to be his undoing.

It's very possible that, had the defenders actually made use of a competent battle plan, the Night King would have been more cautious and stayed behind until victory was assured. So going forward, I choose to believe that the living's strategy was intentionally atrocious in order to lull the Night King into a false sense of security. In that case, I wish them congratulations on a flawless execution of their strategy and the best of luck against Cersei in the final remaining episodes!

As far as a Hardhome writeup goes, there really wasn't a military analysis to do for it. It was more just "White Walkers zerg rush everybody; Jon realizes how $%#!ed they all are." Also, lol at asking me to do one when I still have a million questions to answer.

What are you most proud of having done in life?

Graduating college, with a degree in a field that I care about (even if I haven't gone to work in that field, I still really like history), with a bunch of friends made along the way who have topped anyone I have met in life before or since.

Pets Y/N? If yes, what pets?

N, and I'm cool with it too. I wouldn't mind living with a person with a cat or two, as long as they're not ridiculous about it. Dogs are, and have been, a dealbreaker for me.

Without spoilers, what are your thoughts on the Dark Tower movie, especially in comparison to the book(s)?

It has a really bad reputation, especially among book fans. I don't think it's quite on the level of The Last Airbender movie, but it's not exactly far away either.

Despite this, I think it's ok. If you accept the limitations of what the filmmakers were operating under going in and realize they're trying to condense a universe-spinning, 3,000+ page, seven-book work into a two-hour movie, it's fine. I wouldn't actively seek it out to watch it again, but if I was kidnapped and tortured, and the means of torture was showing me that movie, nothing would happen lol.

Thoughts on podcasts, any you listen to?

I'm more of an audiobook guy than a podcast guy, but I'll typically drop whatever I'm listening to whenever a new episode of Dan Carlin's Hardcore History drops.

Any near-death experiences, or events that made you reconsider your entire worldview/life?

Not really. There was one time when I was 12 or something and walking home from a friend's house (in a suburban residential area) when there was a car that zoomed by going what had to be at least double the speed limit. I was walking in the street at the time and jumped out of the way REAL $%#!ING FAST, but I was young enough to not really consider the mortal implications/my memory could be playing tricks on me and it might not have been going quite as fast as I remember.

On a much, much lower-stakes scale, the ending of Anni 22 and me realizing the exact scope of my emotions and what they meant was a pretty apparent "come to Jesus" moment for me and my future relationship with the game.

(The revelations I had about myself after Anni 21 came gradually, so it's harder to pinpoint an exact moment for those)

Do you believe in ghosts?

Not necessarily ghosts, but I do believe in echoes of the past infecting/imbuing certain places under the right circumstances.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Thoughts on spectating as a substitute for -- god forbid -- actually playing mafia? You always rand mason. Doesn't address the whole chasing the high problem though.

No. Too close to the actual thing, too close to danger. I'd want to chime in and post myself and take control. Not a solution for my issue.

[GeneralHankerchief]

I always liked the Hitler Downfall parodies. I think a part of it is because they actually take effort to land - you need to sync up the text with Hitler's mannerisms at various points in the video, etc. Assuming it's done well, it's always worth a laugh from me.

How about something similar, but far more high effort, like this

Ok, I don't have a backing in Marvel stuff, but that was pretty $%#!ing good.

[GeneralHankerchief]

how do you convince yourself to do something you don't care about but still have to do

The process of coming to terms with this is one of the major steps in becoming an adult. It just becomes a regular part of life eventually. I don't have any specific advice, just... do it, lol. After the first time, it gets easier.

[GeneralHankerchief]

If you (or him) were going die soon but you had the opportunity for one last conversation, what would you want to say to/talk about with Newcomb?

Probably just toss him some dank Mass Effect memes and $%#!post about nothing. Go out with a good memory.

Same question for Voxx/Lissa/myself/MU!!!

Probably variants of the above tbh. True sentiment might leak in towards the very end, but not before then.

As for MU as a whole... well, this is kind of a proof of concept, no?

If you could only eat one food/type of food for the rest of your life, presumed to be a long one, what would it be?

God, I almost don't want to say pizza, but I feel like it has to be? The flexibility of toppings is a pretty big mark in its favor here.

Favourite quote, both well known and something that someone said to you? Favourite quote of your own?

"Everything in moderation, including moderation." Said by someone in my friend group in college much wiser than me. She was a year ahead of me in age, graduated a year early anyway, and we all kind of looked up to her as an example of how to transition to a functioning adult. This quote in particular has really been a kind of guiding post for how I've tried to act on a large scale. Stay grounded, but at the same time, don't be afraid to let loose when called for.

The friend who said that quote has had somewhat of a rough go of it since then and has significantly cut back on contact from everybody after a series of events that I don't feel right discussing here. I miss her.

As for favorite quote of my own, I'll answer it with a meme that I enjoyed making back in the day:

Favourite compliment you've been given, and that you've given to someone else?

My favorite compliment I've ever received came at the culmination of a long road trip (to see the total solar eclipse back in 2017). Out of nowhere, I got called "by far the best driver in the group. You're aggressive, but controlled," which I felt perfectly sums up my driving style and made me feel really good overall. And I have to tell you, after being in the car and experiencing first hand how some of those other $%#!s handled a vehicle... it was deserved.

Favorite compliment I've given to someone else feels really subjective on a number of factors, including how it was taken, so I'll pass on answering that.

[GeneralHankerchief]

I refer to you as "the person who loves mass effect even more than me but for the wrong reasons" do you think this is accurate and how does it feel

lol, that's almost certainly on the nose. I'll take it in the playfully mocking spirit in which it was intended and not argue the point.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Are there any flavour themes for a game that you would be interested in seeing, but would not want to write/host yourself?

I'd like to see LOTR/Tolkien's legendarium get another shot flavorwise. Get somebody who cares about the material, they could take that in a number of interesting directions.

Uh, beyond that, there's a few good historical settings that could use a mafia flavor treatment, mash or otherwise. Late Republic Rome, like what I talked about with Dobby earlier, is an obvious one. Basically any instance in history where there was a concentration of famous people deciding monumental affairs is fertile ground.

Maybe, like, a techbro convention flavor where people rand roles as all the horrible billionaires like Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk and have them set to kill each other. That would be cathartic.

Favourite/unique shower thoughts?

In the closing days of Anni 21 prep, maybe like two days before the rand, we were trying to finalize the roleset and were hung up on one of the very last roles in the entire game. We had spent hours on it, bouncing ideas around and trying to get it right. I called time, took a shower, and came out of it with the rough skeleton of what would eventually become the role:

MU Anniversary 2021 - Role PM

Hello Herlock Sholmes, you are Five, the Town Anniversary Specialist. You've been around MU for a while (but got a good bit busier starting last September FOR SOME REASON) and, until this year, you've been in every Anni. Additionally, you're tied for the record of Anni faction wins with three, not to mention probably putting together the single most infamous moment in any of them with your 2019 Golden God role firing. All of this is to say that you know your way around this specific mash.

1) 2017: Double helping: You have two ITA shots per day. Per technical limitations, you may not use both in a single post. Any alterations to your base rate, internally or otherwise, will affect both of your shots.

2) 2018: Don't talk to neighbors: Once in the game, at night, you may investigate a player's presence in any and all out-of-thread chats (aside from wolfchat of course). You will receive the names of every living player in each conversation your target is in at Start of Day, but not what they talk about or what type of private communication it is (neighborhood, masonry, lovers' chat, etc).

3) 2019: Avoiding the Golden God's Wrath: Once in the game, at night, you may commute and render yourself immune to all day actions (aside from being voted out) the next dayphase. This immunity extends to ITA shots directed at you. While you may vote that day, you may not fire any ITA shots or take part in events. You are still vulnerable on the night phase you activate this ability.

4) 2020: Necessity of Culling: Once in the game, at night, you may rolecop someone who has posted 20 times or fewer the previous day phase. You will receive knowledge of their abilities, if any, but not their alignment. If that player dies at night, your action will be refunded.

Aside from your first ability, which is a passive, you may only submit one action per night.

Good luck, and thanks for playing!

Big breakthrough, allowed us all to get some damn sleep that night.

Most recent shower thoughts?

Didn't really have any yesterday and haven't taken my shower yet tonight, so don't really have an answer here unfortunately.

A historical fact/story that you really enjoy, that is not particularly well known?

So, you know how Afghanistan's got the nickname "Graveyard of Empires"? The Mongols, the British, the Soviets, the US, none were quite able to bring Afghanistan fully to heel. Well, there was one guy who did, way back in the day: Alexander the Great.

You see, Alexander's main foe was King Darius III of Persia. Alexander figured, kill Darius in combat, take the crown for himself, all was part of the plan of eternal glory. Alexander won a bunch of battles, kicked the $%#! out of Darius and the Persians, and was on his way to tracking down the king and finishing him. But then Darius got betrayed by one of his lieutenants, who, sensing which way the wind was blowing, intended on bringing Alexander news of Darius's death in order to gain the ascendant conqueror's favor.

Well, Alexander didn't like this, not one bit. Darius was his, dammit, and he didn't like being robbed of glory like this, especially when ignoble treason was involved. So Darius's killer, a guy named Bessus, fled into the hinterlands. Specifically, parts of what would much later become Afghanistan.

Alexander wanted an example made. So he and his army turned north from their current path, tracked Bessus down, looked for clues on the way, made nice with local leaders, conquered some unexpected territory, fought a couple more battles, won them all, and eventually, yes, caught up to and killed Bessus. Then, when all this was done, Alexander installed new governors to hold the territory he had just gotten on the chase and resumed his actual march.

Alexander the Great was the one guy to conquer Afghanistan, and he did it as a side effect because there was a guy hiding in the country who he really wanted dead.

There's a reason why Alexander the Great tops so many lists of historical conquerors.

Have you ever bought into a scam, or been close to?

No, but one of the guys on my floor in freshman year of college (I was friendly enough with him, but he wasn't part of my group or anything) bought into a very obvious pyramid scheme about halfway through the year which resulted into damn near half his dorm being taken up by cases and cases of these disgusting-tasting energy drinks that he tried to recoup his investment in. I know it's mean, but we couldn't help but laugh as the poor guy got more and more desperate as he tried to unload the drinks on anyone for just something.

What is your favourite season/part of Bojack Horseman?

Hmm, haven't watched the show in a while. I think I remember liking s3 the best, especially the later arc. All the $%#! just piles down on Bojack, and he reacts in the absolute worst way possible - because of course he does - before finally just saying $%#! it all and bailing entirely on everything. I can definitely relate to that sentiment.

[Visorslash]

Didn't really have any yesterday and haven't taken my shower yet tonight, so don't really have an answer here unfortunately.

why night over morning showerer?

[GeneralHankerchief]

how many pears do you think you could eat in one sitting if pushed to your limits

finally, getting to the HARD HITTING questions late in the game

Anyway, assuming I fast for a reasonable amount of time beforehand and provide the proper seasonings, I would cut the pears in very bite-sized pieces. I would probably supplement the meal with cheese and crackers of various types just in order to provide variety. The drink would be white wine; while I typically gravitate towards reds, white wine is clearly called for in this situation.

The goal, mentally, would be to treat the cut pears, cheese, crackers, and wine as a very extended, "classy" snack. This would allow me to pig the $%#! out and keep just munching away while I put on Lord of the Rings or something and otherwise just totally zombie out.

Under those conditions, let's say 33.34, repeating of course.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Didn't really have any yesterday and haven't taken my shower yet tonight, so don't really have an answer here unfortunately.

why night over morning showerer?

I like the feeling of being clean when going to bed. Otherwise the sheets get kinda scuzzy and I don't get as good of a sleep, especially not on hot nights like this.

[GeneralHankerchief]

How would you fall prey to a cult - if one were to target you successfully, what parts of you would be most susceptible?

I don't know, I'm a pretty skeptical guy by nature. That familiar grumpy, "seen it all already" persona you're all familiar with in the Discord? Not really putting it on much! I'm inclined to distrust anyone who claims they have the secret to making me happy or at peace or whatever. idk what "happy" even is to me, as discussed in Visor's question earlier in the AMA.

Maybe, like, a cult that double secret circumvents the usual stuff, and just acts as a friend group or something to start, doesn't put on airs at all, and the cult leader is incognito among the group members, but gradually asserts his (it's always a he) dominant personality, and this already sounds completely ridiculous and we're into like one and a half steps out of 28.

tl;dr IM IMMUNE

Have you ever considered getting into theatre and why/why not?

Acted in a couple of school plays in middle/high school. Just bit parts. Didn't really like it. Had to be at way too many rehearsals where I stood around for like 3 hours repeating the same line over and over again because the actual named characters had to keep working on stuff.

Did a little library theater around the same time, extracurricular. Fractured fairy tales, that sort of thing. Mostly for little kids (and of course the parents), trying to get them to read more. Eventually we wrote our own scripts for 10 minute plays, stuff like that. Liked that a lot more.

Don't think I'd go back to it, just way too little output for my investment level.

What is a pet peeve of yours that you usually don't bother correcting the situation for/telling people about, but minorly bugs you whenever it comes up?

Whenever somebody misspells my username, or even my real name (there are a couple of common variants). I'm way past the point of correcting people. It's better than pronouncing it wrong anyway - I think.

Are there any questions that were not asked here, but you have an answer for?

Christ, I hope not. Was mostly coming into this expecting the big ones - asking me about this year's and last year's Anni, "why'd you leave", that sort of thing. Got those. Everything beyond that was in the dark.

[Hally]

not a question but

wish we had gotten to play with each other and talk more but the times we have were a pleasure

best of luck, you’re onto bigger and better things o7

[c4e5g3d5]

Maybe, like, a cult that double secret circumvents the usual stuff, and just acts as a friend group or something to start, doesn't put on airs at all, and the cult leader is incognito among the group members, but gradually asserts his (it's always a he) dominant personality, and this already sounds completely ridiculous and we're into like one and a half steps out of 28.

Isn't this, like, a lot of cults

[GeneralHankerchief]

Somewhat similarly, is there anything in particular you really want to talk/soapbox about, but just haven't had the chance to for whatever reason?

is there anything you want us to know before you leave that no one's asked about yet

I just want to emphasize one last time that my mafia story that I've discussed here is my own. I've had my ups and downs with the game (and the community) over the years, and have come to terms with its effect on me, and have discussed it with you all because a) you asked and b) because it might help other people feeling the same, but that does not mean my solution is your solution. My problem might not even be your problem.

Just because I do not have a healthy relationship with the game, that does not automatically mean that nobody does. For all I know, you, the person reading this, may be perfectly well-adjusted when it comes to playing the game and have your boundaries fully set, adhered to, and enforced. You do not necessarily have to rethink everything simply because of what I have said here.

Know yourself, learn yourself, make your own decisions. It's good advice in general really, but doubly so for this.

---

Also, expectations reads suck. Please stop making them. There are a million different factors as to why somebody might be having a great, good, or bad game regardless of who they are. Please try to take those into account before passing judgement.

[GeneralHankerchief]

I want to thank everyone who contacted me, publicly or privately, over the course of this AMA to express their support, or well-wishes, or just to say hi in general. It really does mean a lot to me, even if I'm not the best at expressing sentiment like this.

Mafia is bad, but you all are good.

[GeneralHankerchief]

Ok, thanks again all. I'm passing the AMA off to @Zack, who will have much funnier answers with about 5% of the wordcount.

Maybe I'll see you down the road sometime.